Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

As a title, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is much too long. At 124 minutes, the film was much too long as well. It really should have been cut by, let's say, 124 minutes.

There was no need for this fourth Indiana Jones picture to be made. The reason why it was can only be a mystery as it adds nothing to the Indiana Jones mythology. I imagine money played a role somewhere, although I do find it hard to believe that Steven Spielberg or George Lucas would ever make a film principally for that reason.

What went wrong? First of all, the script. Dull and convoluted. This is the plot: Indy is kidnapped by some Soviet agents and forced to find a sarcophagus at a top secret warehouse in America. Having done so, he escapes from the agents' clutches, only to be caught again, before escaping again etc. In between times, our hero is removed from his college post at the instigation of anti-communists. The story moves to Peru where Oxley, a professor friend of Jones, has gone missing. Indy and his new young sidekick, Mutt, find a crystal skull. Apparently, Oxley was looking for this artifact, found it and took it away before replacing it in the graveyard where Indy and Mutt found it again. With the Soviet agents hard on their trail, the pair move on to an old Mayan period site. There, they battle with the communists, find Oxley and more besides and, somehow, manage to return the crystal skull to its rightful owner.

So far, so very Indiana Jones. In that sense the film is a success - it delivers all the things that an Indiana Jones film should: car chases, punch ups, snakes, fantastical objects, ancient civilisations, riddles and codes etc. But as the plot outline above suggests, it doesn't do so in a very streamlined fashion (compare the plot with that for Raiders of the Lost Ark: Indy goes to Egypt to find the Ark of the Covenant. He does so, only for the Nazis to steal it. A final showdown ensues when the Nazis open the ark, thus destroying themselves. QED).

One of the reasons for the dullness of the plot are the numerous references to Indiana Jones's age. Sure, it can't be ignored, but too many references undermine Indiana Jones as a hero and give undeserved attention to Mutt as his heir apparent. This would be justified if the Crystal Skull was to be Harrison Ford's last outing as Henry Jones Jr, but it isn't, so was unnecessary.

Secondly, I felt that the references to the 50s were too heavy and imposing. The film begins with two guys and gals in their car racing along the road with some stereotypical 50s music blaring out. Were we watching Indiana Jones or American Graffiti? Or maybe the first Back to the Future film/ The 50s chic continues when Indiana speaks to Mutt in a café. I'm afraid I don't know what the gangs were called in 50s America, but if you imagine the two gangs in Grease, it is they who populate the café.

The 50s chic is never stronger than in the person of Mutt who in appearance and probably in attitude is firmly modelled on Marlon Brando. Why? Having a character so firmly of an age roots the film in that period in a way that distracts from its timeless qualities. The first and third Indiana Jones films were set in the 30s but in a very naturalistic way that did not impose upon the story. This takes the opposite view, to the film's detriment.

An exciting feature of the first three Indiana Jones films was their realness in terms of the special effects. The Crystal Skull is laden with CGI effects. To my mind, CGI effects are a resource of last resort. Good film makers should build their own sets. Not only does it look better but we get to appreciate their ingenuity more.
Steven Spielberg is one of the greatest cinema directors alive today, but if he has a weakness it must be his sentimentality. The final scene of Schindler's List - where the Jews saved by Schindler come over the hill to lay stones on his grave - and the last 40 minutes of A.I. should never have been shot. The Crystal Skull suffers from the same ailment in its treatment of Marcus Brody, played in the first three films by Denholm Eliot. At first, the nod to him is handled well: we see a portrait of him on the wall at Indiana Jones's college. Without a word being said, we see (or are reminded?) that Marcus held a position of seniority at Marshall College and that he has been remembered after his death. A nice touch. In the next scene, Indy and Brody's successor as Dean, Charles Stanforth (Jim Broadbent) are speaking in the former's study. On the desk are photos of Brody and Henry Jones Jr. Mention is made of them. Fine. But when we see that a great sculpture of Brody has been erected on a plinth in the grounds of the college. Spielberg has in a moment spoiled a rather tender remembrance.

The above notwithstanding, the departed are treated better than those present. One should not expect action-adventure films to be searing psychological studies, but a little nod to character would not go amiss. Indiana Jones's friend George 'Mac' McHale (Ray Winstone) turns out to be a traitor. And then he is not. And then he is. Ad nauseam. Irene Spalko (Cate Blanchett) is the principle villain. It is not quite clear though whether she is working on behalf of the Soviet Government or for herself. What is clear, though, is that she desires the crystal skull because it grants knowledge of all things to the owner. Unfortunately, when she finally gains the skull and that knowledge, we see nothing of it except a crazed expression and a few CGI pyrotechnics.


The biggest mistake that The Crystal Skull makes in terms of characters are the appearance of Mutt and return of his mother, Marian Ravenwood. Neither are in the slightest way needed. Of course, it is good to see Marian again; she is a neat point of connection to Raiders of the Lost Ark. But having seen her, I must say that I do not think that action-adventure films do justice to the acting talents of 50 something actresses. These films demand an energy and virility of person that only the young or fit men can provide. The only way in which the presence of a middle aged woman can be justified in terms of the story is if she is fully a part of the adventure - jumping over the rocks, solving the riddles and shooting the enemy. Karen Allen as Marian Ravenwood was not a part of the story in this way and was therefore superfluous to it.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is a shallow and flawed film. It is not a terrible one. You can watch it without thinking that you have wasted two hours of your life, but as I said above, it is a tremendous pity that it did not offer anything new to the Indiana Jones mythos.

First Thoughts on Devil May Care

Work took me to West Kensington yesterday, so on the way, I stopped at Victoria Station and picked up a copy of Sebastian Faulk's Bond novel, Devil May Care. It has a promising opening, with Bond returning to London from his sabbatical in Rome (during which he sees Paul VI address the faithful!) before heading off to Paris. France is Faulks' country with his three war novels all being set there (in whole or in part). The cover of Devil May Care states that it is by 'Sebastian Faulks writing as Ian Fleming' which to me is an unnecessary affectation.

As for Bond, he is world weary; amazingly, he turns down the chance to sleep with a woman in Rome. Blimey. Had I picked up the wrong book? Don't worry, though, he and said woman meet again in Paris and, while they have not hit the sack together (yet), they are now chasing the baddie and that can only lead to the bedroom.

One thing I must commend Faulks for is the fact that as I read this book, I do not have an image of Daniel Craig - or Sean Connery (the book is set in 1967) - in my mind. Instead, the Bond of Devil May Care is the man described by Ian Fleming in his books. Here is an image of him:

In buying the book, I have also discovered that Sebastian Faulks has a new website (here). Very good! I shall visit it now to find out the answer to (what is for me) the great question at the end of my favourite Faulks book The Girl at the Lion D'Or: What happened to Anne?

Old Habits Die Hard

My last post referred to John Maynard-Keynes. Looking at his Wikipedia entry I see that it states that in 1945 Maynard-Keynes served on the board of directors of the British Eugenics Society. This, "even as documented proof of the Nazi concentration camps were becoming more widely known in Great Britain during the final year of World War II as British and American troops liberated several concentration camps in Germany." The Wiki writer adds, "... in 1946 before his death, Keynes still declared eugenics "the most important, significant and, I would add, genuine branch of sociology which exists."

The British Eugenics Society still exists, except that nowadays it is called The Galton Institute. Amazingly (and according to Wikipedia) it only changed its name in 1989.

I haven't delved deep into the website of the Galton Institute (formerly known as the British Eugenics Society - hey, if they can do it for the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, formerly known as the Holy Office, why can't we?), but in its links page I note that it links to Marie Stopes International. Marie Stopes was, of course, an advocate of eugenics back in the 'innocent' 20s. The G.I. doesn't necessarily endorse the 'contents of linked sites', but it still has this kind word to say of M.S.I, "The Birth Control Trust of the Galton Institute has made substantial contributions to the work of MSI in developing countries..." Old leopards never change their spots, eh?

Do you think there might be more? You'd be right. The G.I. links to the website of a body I have never heard of called The Optimum Population Trust. It is "[a] site warning of the impact of increasing population (both worldwide and in the UK) on resource depletion and environmental damage. Visitors can sign a petition urging the government to adopt a policy of initially stabilising then promoting a gradual decrease in the size of the UK population." If you are a eugenophile I urge you to sign it and sign you and your genes out of existence - leave the world to the children of those who care for both it and the human race.

A Special Relationship?

Donal Blaney asks if Gordon Brown has botched Britain's 'special relationship' with America. He (Brown) could only have done so if there was a special relationship between the two countries in the first place, and I am not sure that there ever was. Let's take the post-war period. America was not very quick to provide aid once the war ended. Maynard-Keynes went begging in 1946 to the Federal Reserve - and how they made him beg - but could only get the money subject to conditions that depressed the British economy - while enriching the American.

Then there was the Suez Crisis (1956) where America actually acted against Britain. And I believe I am correct in saying that there were those in the American Government who would have been quite happy for Britain to receive no help from the USA when we went to war against Argentina in 1982. Thank goodness for Ronald Reagan (although, where was the special relationship at the time of Grenada [1983]?).

Blaney is rightly dismayed by the fact that George Bush has fostered close ties with Germany and France and chosen to base a new media centre in Brussels rather than London. "It is a development," he says, "that would surely not have been countenanced during the era of Thatcher-Reagan or Bush-Blair relations.". And therein surely lies the problem. This so-called 'special relationship' has never been one of governments (because except for the time [1783] when the colonial upstarts foolishly decided to go solo and when we rightly gave them a beating [1812] for this presumption, British and American people have got on quite well), only of particular politicians - Mr Reagan and Mrs Thatcher; Mr Clinton and Mr Blair. Blaney mentions Blair-Bush. But, no, there was never anything special there. The supine way in which Tony Blair allowed George Bush to lead him into Iraq shows that.

I am open to correction, but as far as I can tell, the United States of America always and only acts in its own best interests. I don't blame it for doing this, but let's have no talk of special relationships. It exists when our leaders get on and when the interests of both countries co-incide. And that is indicitive of no close relationship at all.

Indy Meets His Match

An amusing report in today's Times. The heading says it all: Indiana Jones and the wrath of the Communist Party. Communists never were known for their sense of humour and, perhaps unsurprisingly, nothing has changed in the 18 years since its fall:

The Communist Party’s ideology committee in Russia’s second largest city [St Petersburg] saw red over the plot. In an open letter, it declared: “Your work in this film is an insult to the Soviet and Russian people, who remember the difficult Fifties when our country was concluding its reconstruction after the Great War, but did not send merciless terrorists to the USA.” It said that Russians had loved Ford in previous serious roles – which include a Soviet submarine commander in K-19: The Widowmaker – but went on: “You have no future in Russia any more. Speaking plainly, it is better for you not to come here. You will be beaten and despised.”

Read all about it here. One interesting fact to come out in this report is that the Communist Party is the second largest party in the Russian Parliament. It does not justify Vladimir Putin's policies, but gives an interesting context for the way in which he rules the country.

Alas, poor Indy. Not only have the commies been criticising him, but so has the head of the Australian World Archeological Congress, who has accused Jones Jr of being an "ethical nightmare",

Claire Smith, of Newcastle University, said that the fictional archaeologist was guilty of an “imperialist assumption that artifacts in far-flung parts of the world needed ‘protection’ supplied by the West”.

She told the Australian Broadcasting Corporation: “In pursuit of fortune and glory Jones ignores international treaties, treats human remains as weapons and destroys archaeological sites in a bid to escape from potential entombment. Archaeologists are concerned with preserving the past, not making a profit from it, and sometimes Jones seems more finely tuned to the commercial value of an artifact than the information it can give us.”

Protection: How many exhibits of Baghdad Museum were lost after the fall of Saddam Hussein?

Fortune and glory: I watched Raiders of the Lost Ark and The Last Crusade recently, and I can't remember Indiana Jones being much concerned with that. The whole emphasis was on the recovery of the items in question for museums, i.e. for the community.

Bones as weapons and destruction of archaeological sites: Well, let's see if Ms Smith says that after she has been chased by murderous Nazis or Communists!

Commercial Value: See Fortune and Glory, above. I know that in Raiders, Belloq tells Jones that they are very alike, but I don't recall Jones ever attempting to sell any of his artifacts. Perhaps this happens in The Temple of Doom - the poorest of the quartet and which I would not wish to watch again.

Fleming Is Back

Immorality, misogyny and general ruthlessness never look so attractive as when they incarnated in the person of James Bond. This year marks the 100th anniversary of his creator's birth. Ian Fleming was born on 28th May 1908 and on that day this year, Penguin Books are publishing a new novel, The Devil May Care. Written by Sebastian Faulks it features a villian with a monkey's hand and M doing Yoga. Hmm. Well, so far as the latter is concerned, it is set in the 60s. The former could be a very silly thing indeed. However, given Faulks' authorship and the fact that after Human Traces and Engleby he owes us a good (after the former) and really enjoyable (after the latter) book, we may hope that it turns out to be a positive plot point.

The Daily Telegraph today has an interview with Faulks where he speaks about the book. He says it has been written 80% in the style of Fleming. The other 20% is presumably taken up by the Bond girl who "has a little more depth than Fleming’s women, but not at the expense of glamour."

By-the-bye, myself and 5MinJim visited the Fleming Centenary Exhibition at the Imperial War Museum a few weeks ago. Thought not very large, there were some very good exhibits - first copies of books, artwork, props from the films, family items etc - that made it well worth a visit. Visit the website here.

A Matter of Conscience

There have been some interesting comments on the Catholic blogosphere about this week's shameful decision of M.Ps to pass the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill and not reduce the time limit for procuring an abortion. One post that I have just read and which has really jumped out at me, however, was written by Fr John Boyle. Writing about an interview given by Archbishop Vincent Nicolls following the votes and an interview with a Catholic doctor who wants to father a 'saviour sibling' to provide transplant material for his sick son, he writes,

Bishop Nicholls spoke very compassionately and sought to avoid judging the man in question, even saying that he must make the decision which his conscience, before God, dictates. I'm afraid this is not sufficient. Whilst one can have sympathy with the man in question, one could not condone a decision to create and select embryos to be implanted for the purpose of providing a cure for a sick sibling, whatever the conscience of the person making the decision. Conscience is not supreme (my emphasis).

Taken at face value, citing the primacy of one's conscience has got to be the great moral get out. But it won't wash for Catholics, as they are expected to ensure that it is informed. It is surely in this light that the Catechism of the Catholic Church says,

Man has the right to act in conscience and in freedom so as personally to make moral decisions. "He must not be forced to act contrary to his conscience..." (CCC para 1782)

So, I wonder if Fr Boyle might have been wise to qualify his last sentence: An uninformed conscience is not supreme. That would imply that an informed one is. Is it? If it isn't, what use is it? And does that make Catholics intellectual slaves to Rome? Big questions. It looks like I have some research ahead!

Manchester United Triumph

Click to enlarge and bask in.

Caesar in the Rhone

Exciting news! (c/o L. for which, thanks.)
Daily Telegraph (14.5.08)

A marble bust of Julius Caesar thought to date back to 46 B.C. has been found by divers in the Rhone River in France. The culture ministry said that the life-sized bust is believed to be the oldest of the Roman emperor ever discovered.

It portrays the Roman ruler at an advanced age, with wrinkles and hollows in his face. Divers from an archaeological team uncovered the bust and a collection of other finds in the Rhone near the town of Arles, which Caesar founded.

Among other items in the treasure trove of ancient objects is a 5.9 foot marble statue of Neptune, dated to the third century. Two smaller statues, both bronze and measuring 27.5 inches, were also found. One of them, a satyr with his hands tied behind his back, “doubtless” originated in Hellenic Greece, the ministry said. “Some [of the discoveries] are unique in Europe,” said Christine Albanel, the French culture minister, who added that the bust of Caesar was an outstanding discovery and in a class of its own.

“This marble bust of the founder of the Roman city of Arles constitutes the most ancient representation known today of Caesar,” a ministry statement said, adding that it “undoubtedly” dates to the creation of Arles in 46 B.C. Among other things, researchers are trying to uncover “in what context these statues were thrown into the river,” said Michel L’Hour, who heads the Department of Subaquatic Archaeological Research, whose divers made the discovery between September and October last year.

The site “has barely been skimmed,” Mr L’Hour said, adding that a new search operation will begin this summer. He said that with its Roman beginnings, the Rhone and Arles region, in Provence in the southern France, and “propitious” for discoveries. Miss Albanel called the find “exceptional” and said that the Caesar bust is “the oldest representation known today” of the emperor. (Original report here)

Dale, Dunwoody and a Little White Lie

It is a truism that if you take the moral high ground over any given subject, your position only remains tenable for as long as you abide by the same morality which you expect of others.

So, for example, if you are a supporter of the Conservative Party who is angry about the lies that Tamsin Dunwoody, the prospective Labour Party candidate for Crewe and Nantwich, has told about Edward Timpson, the Conservative candidate, you would not therefore lie in return about her. And by extension, you would not make use of a lie in order to attack her.

But this, unfortunately, is what Conservative supporter and blogger Iain Dale has just done here. In short, a Tory campaigner met Mrs Dunwoody at a hotel and told her that he was a Labour campaigner. She invited him to her table where they talked about the upcoming by-election. He then e-mailed Dale, who has reproduced the e-mail on his blog.

Iain Dale has justified the publishing of the e-mail on the grounds that Mrs Dunwoody has lied about Edward Timpson in her campaign. There is no doubt that she has acted disreputably. Just take a look at the Crew and Nantwich Labour party website. Mrs Dunwoody is "one of us" it proclaims. She lives outside the constituency. She thinks it is an acceptable practice to run a campaign which concentrates as much on putting down Mr Timpson as explaining why she deserves to be C & N's MP. And she is not slow at all to remind us that she is the much loved daughter of Gwyneth Dunwoody, whose death occasioned this by-election. Where are the Left wingers who derided the election of Bilawal Bhutto Zadari as joint leader of his assassinated mother's political party? And in case we are so thick as to not to be impressed by Mrs Dunwoody's genealogy, she reminds us that she is the great-granddaughter of suffragettes. Well, well done her!

As I said above, Dale justified his post on the grounds that Dunwoody has lied about Timpson (e.g. by accusing him of being a con man). Maybe she has, but two wrongs do not make a right. By acting as if they do, Dale enters the vicious cycle of negative campaigning that will only encourage the opposition to be even more negative in its approach towards the Conservatives. It isn't easy taking the moral high ground, but if you insist upon it (and for the good of democracy, all political parties should) you must be prepared to tough it out.

United at 10

For reasons unknown to myself, I have never really got into blogging about football. However, I must mention here the Venerable Bede's post on Manchester United's tenth league title. Read it here. And having watched it several times now, I can't help but embed Bede's video of Ryan Giggs's FA Cup goal against Arsenal in the glorious year of 1999.

Even now, I am filled with awe at that man's talents. How fitting it was that on the day he equalled Sir Bobby Charlton's record number of appearances for United, he should score the goal that sealed the title for us as well.

A Broad Church Or Just A Messy One?

Last weekend, the Catholic Herald ran a front page story titled "Williams faces historic choice says Vatican" You can read the story here. It has inspired the normally distinctly unpolemical Arathorn to make what the papers might call a 'withering riposte'. Read it here, if you dare!

TeSSA in Scarborough (III)

The Workshop Scenario (see here for details) mentioned that alot of Polish staff would be affected by the Railway Company's decision to reduce its staff in order to build the new line. Without my notes, I can't remember why this was the case (though if any reader is interested to know more, I can bring them home from the office and put them on the blog next week), but all the workshop groups whose presentation on What They Would Do To Fight The Redundancies mentioned the need to print literature in Polish as well as English so that the Poles were not left out of the loop.

One group, when talking about their strategy to fight the redundancies stated that it would, of course, speak to various community groups. All the groups said they would do this. But unlike the others, this group mentioned that it would also speak to the local Catholic priest. After all, as the spokesman said, with the Vatican on your side, who can stand against you?! This raised a good laugh from all and sundry. It also brought back to mind what one of the 'facilitators' (yuk) said to our group earlier in the day, namely, that he had spoken to a Pole one time and got him interested in the union by citing the example of Lech Walesa. I said that he might have mentioned Pope John Paul II as well. But for the facilitator, only Lech Walesa mattered.

I should not have been surprised at this comment. After all, I attended another union workshop a while ago and made mention of the Catholic Church's long history of social teaching - from Leo XIII's encyclical Rerum Novarum onwards. There was complete ignorance of this. This seems to me to be a great shame and a missed opportunity for the unions.

TeSSA in Scarbourgh (II)

I mentioned in my previous post that the TeSSA conference was one of two halves and that the second were the speeches. They were made by a variety of people, most notable Gerry Doherty, the general secretary and Manuel Cortes, Doherty's assistant.

Doherty built his opening address upon a speech made to the main TSSA conference by Tony Benn earlier in the week. The big three questions he (Benn) said was 'what is going on, why is it happening and what are we going to do about it?'. To his credit, Doherty focussed on what the TSSA can do for its members.

However, it was also clear from Gerry Doherty's speech that Benn is his hero. Well,that is fine, except that Tony Benn does not have anything to offer workers today. His politics are those of the 70s: the divisive politics of socialism that lead to the Winter of Discontent and has lead to 29 years and counting of Thatcherism under Mrs Thatcher and the laughably named New Labour.

Manuel Cortes is the man for whom the word 'spirited' was invented. He is a very energetic orator. But as with Benn, his are the politics of division; them and us; friend and foe. According to Cortes, the union struggle is all about POWER.

This, of course, is nonsense. The union struggle is about justice. Unfortunately, Cortes's outlook will never be challenged while the unions are faced with pigheaded managers who are the true parents of union firebrands. A perfect example of these stupid people was given by another speaker - Network Rail. Senior managers there forced TSSA represenatives to take annual leave in order to come to the conference. I wish I had my notes with me, because I'm sure the same speaker referred to tactics of intimidation and fear used against union members in the exercise of their office.

I suppose I am being hopelessly naive, but I would have thought that the unions would have learnt from the mistakes that they made up to the 70s and, while recognising that Management are the Opposition, would seek a more conciliatory relationship with them. And vice versa. Surely, what we have to gain by friendship would be far more than could be gained by perpetually being rivals.

TeSSA in Scarborough

This week, I decamped to Scarborough for a Reps Conference held by my union, the TSSA. It was a conference of two halves. The first was the workshops which were held over the course of the two days. The second were the mercifully short speeches as made by the General Secretary amongst others.

The workshops kicked off with the presentation of a scenario: A Rail company wants to re-open a line that was shut in the 60s. But to do so, it needs to reduce staff numbers at a number of small stations elsewhere (replacing them with ticket machines). How should the union respond?

The answer is, of course, obvious. And it is (given that we believe the move to be a bad one) that we start a campaign to keep the stations staffed. This begins with an assessment with who our members are. Believe it or not, the union does not always keep up-to-date records of its membership in any given place. And continues with the creation of a 'steering group'. The campaign really gets going when affected parties (rail users, members of the local community, community groups etc) are contacted to let them know what is going on.

After their initial meeting, each member of a workshop group went off to a new workshop which looked at specific areas of the campaign: communications, building activism and so on. We rejoined our original group on Wednesday morning to discuss what we had learnt.

I have attended workshops before, but this was my first union one. It was definitely a learning experience. Thankfully, they did not revolve around simply getting the members out on strike.

Replacing Matter With a Void

While I am always pleased to see the advance of the Tridentine cause in the Catholic Church, I think that nothing makes me more proud to be a Catholic when I hear of churches who are praying for the bereaved. This is what is happening today after the murder of a teenager in London and the cyclone that has struck Burma.

And while the Church responds to these awful events with prayer, I sometimes wonder what words of encouragement do bodies like the National Secular Society have for those caught up in these events?

Well, a perusal of the front page of its website reveals that top of their news agenda this week is the House of Lords vote against the law of blasphemy, the success of the Church of England's investments and the placing of a under performing Catholic school into 'special measures' status.

Hmm. Now, while these are very worthy stories, they are not very inspiring, are they? But, should they be? Well, no, they shouldn't, but surely the NSS should be saying something - anything - to help people make sense of the world that they live in - from a rational perspective. Perhaps they just can't. It certainly looks like that from their website.

And that is a reason why I could not be a secularist. The NSS has lots to say about what it thinks is wrong with the world (see its Campaigns page) but not a great deal about what it thinks is right. It digs a hole in the ground and congratulates itself for getting rid of the earth, but tries to replace it with a void.

Dismay on the Final Day

Leicester Tigers 31 Harlequins 28

Woe! Leading 28 - 24 with just four minutes left to play, Harlequins conceded a try yesterday and not only lost to the Tigers but fell out of the reckoning (a) for the premiership play-offs and (b) for next year's Heineken Cup... possibly. If Bath beat Worcester Warriors in the final of the European Challenge Cup, we go through to the H.C. If the Warriors win, it is the E.C.C. for Quins next season.

In terms of yesterday's game, the big positive was simply that Harlequins came that close to beating the Tigers. It doesn't normally happen. The times they are a'changin' and if we can come so close once we can do so again and then, maybe, beat them.

In terms of the season, I am dead pleased at Harlequins performance in the league this year. It was as good as their form in the Anglo-Welsh and Heineken Cups was bad. Maybe, as they grow in experience, that will change. That should be the target for next year. Back to the league, Quins finished sixth on 63 points - equal points with Sale. But, if only we had held on against Leicester we would this morning have been in fourth place with a play-off game against Wasps to look forward to. Oh well. One or two people on the Come All Within Quins' fans' message board were positively angry at Harlequins' 'choke' yesterday. For my part, the fact that the team has improved since last season and the fact that we came so close to doing even better means I can't be angry - just pleased by what was done and excited by what might have been and what is a realistic target for next year.

On on Quins!

Documenta Latina

The Catholic Latin renaissance continues! The Vatican website now has a Latin section. Read it here.

What Should Labour Do Next?

Mauled in the local elections, a country mile behind the Conservative Party in the polls: what does the Labour Party need to do to stand a fighting chance of winning the next general election? I was mulling over this question on the way home from work, and here are a few of the ideas that I came up with. They are most likely completely unoriginal but remain my suggestions:

1. The Labour Party (particularly the Government) needs to reread the 2005 manifesto and remind itself of what it stands for. The credit crisis, lost files, bank difficulties and the 10p tax debacle give me the impression that the party is no longer pro-active but merely reactive and that is a parlous state for a Government to be in.

2. Once the Government has reminded itself of why it was elected, a special effort must be made by Cabinet ministers to broadcast the news. There are several reasons for this:
(a) their authority will make what they have to say more credible than if MPs or supporters took the lead.

(b) they - and especially the younger members - are the future of the Labour Party. So, their appearances will not only have an impact of the electorate now but on Labour Party members in the future. For, the time will come when Gordon Brown steps down, and then, if the party is to effectively oppose the Conservative Party, it will need to have a heavyweight to step in to replace him. One reason why Hague, Duncan-Smith and Howard failed as leaders was that at the time (in Hague's case) they were not of sufficient statue to challenge Tony Blair. Who is a heavyweight within the Government now? Miliband? Too young. Jacqui Smith. Too lightweight (the fact that I have to use her first name proves this). Ed Balls. Mmm. Possible, but what has he done as a minister, exactly?

(c) Right now, Gordon Brown is damaged goods. To the electorate, he is the personification of the 1st May defeat. Therefore, if he continues to take the limelight, the Labour Party will surely continue to flounder as the electorate will continue to be reminded of the mauling that Labour received. I would not say that Brown should disappear altogether. But now that the ugly business of explaining away the election defeat has been finished, he should manage his public appearances or utterances alot more carefully. Spin doctors should be scouring the country for good news that Mr Brown can be associated with again.

3. Labour MPs must stay loyal and - if they have any reservations about Mr Brown's government - stay quiet or, at any rate, make their criticisms behind closed doors. That is what happened in 1997, that is what needs to happen now. When mouthing off against the Government, MPs think they are waving the flag of true Socialism or Liberalism or Conservatism, but all the public sees is a party with a gun to its head, slowly squeezing the trigger. From a Conservative perspective, watching the many arguments during the 90s was incredibly dispiriting because one knew that it could only be damaging the public's view of the party. Freedom does not exist within a parliamentary political party, only strength and weakness; you are either one or the other. The public knows this, and judges parties accordingly. Time and again, Governments fall because MPs fail to recognise this.

4. In all public utterances, be positive. Put policy first. Tory bashing may be useful, but it should be secondary to speaking about why the Labour Government is so good. So the Conservatives have no policies - they don't need them; all the Tories need to do is bide their time and wait for Labour to destroy itself. That is not quite true, the Conservative Party does not need to give the people a few reasons to support it, but even if those reasons are straight out of the Labour policy drawer, Labour should not be content to bang on about this. Aside from the fact that they did the same to get elected in 1997, if it comes down to voting for one of two similar parties, the elector will vote for the one that has not been in power for so many years. The grass is always greener on the other side.

Speaking about being positive, why are the Top 50 (no less) achievements of the Labour Government (1997 - to present) at the bottom of the main page of its website? And why does the News Section lead with an attack on David Cameron? It is the second story, about the 'new rules for skilled foreign workers' that ought to be first.

Ouch!

Harlequins 16 Sale 23 Harlequins' last home game of the season saw them take on Sale Sharks; when we played Sale this time last year, Quins won 49 - 0. Back then, the Stockport side had been decimated by injuries and were playing for nothing, being in middle table nobody's land. This time, however, it was quite a different story, with Sale also being in the running for a play-off spot.
Harlequins made the brighter start, although I do not recall that the midfield pressure lead to too many encampments on the Sale try-line. It must have been about twenty or so minutes in that Sale started to turn the game around. Not long later, Quins hooker Tani Fuga was stretchered off following an unseen injury. This could not have helped Harlequins' concentration.

Once Sale had gained a hold on the game, they never let it go. Thus, when Quins went 5 - 0 up, that ultimately represented the high point of the game. Sale soon struck back, thanks, it has to be said, to some bad defending by Harlequins. At half time, the visitors were 11 - 20 ahead.
Before the game began, and eager to get the fans riled up and ready to support their team, the Quins' PA turned up the music to the maximum level. It was deafening and not a particularly nice thing to have to suffer. At half time, however, the entertainment was a little more sedate - an example of falconry. Falconry? Apparently it is a traditional sport in the United Arab Emirates and Harlequins, who are sponsored by Etihad Airlines, was holding Abu Dabi Day. Hmm. Still, the falcon put on a super display of flying (and scaring the seagulls!), which included hovering and diving, before catching its meaty reward.
In the second half, Harlequins tried hard to force their way back into the game, but to no avail. A glimmer of hope appeared when not one but two Sale players were sinbinned but the home side could only score one try during that period.

In the end, Sale's indiscipline notwithstanding, they justly won this game. They were stronger in defence - normally a Quins' trait - and more incisive in attack.

Despite this defeat, because both Wasps and Leicester Tigers lost today, Harlequins are not quite out of the running for the play-offs. Here is how the table looks tonight:

1 Gloucester 21 70
2 Bath 21 68
3 Sale 21 63
4 Harlequins 21 61
5 Wasps 20 60
6 Leicester 21 59

How do we get into the play-offs? Simple, by beating Leicester next week and hoping that Wasps lose one or both of their last two games. Now, if they still had to play one or two of the top six, that would be a realistic prospect. Unfortunately, their next opponents are Newcastle (10th) on Wednesday and Leeds (12th) next weekend. Quins, therefore, are most unlikely to progress any further this season. But never mind, it has been a good campaign and the team has acquitted itself well. As Dean Richards, the Director of Rugby has pointed out on a few occasions, the team is a young one. It has the talent to succeed but, perhaps, not yet the experience. Not yet.

London and Downside

Boris pulls it off. Not the title of an Enid Blyton novel, but a possible newspaper headline for today. Congratulations go to Mr Johnson, and hard lines to Ken Livingstone. For someone who could be so ungracious while he was mayor, he made a very gracious speech accepting defeat. As for Boris's victory speech, it was very typically him; a little wayward but amusing. There were even one or two good turns-of-phrase. I liked this one particularly: "Where there have been mistakes we will rectify them, where there are achievements we will build on them, where there are neglected opportunities we will seize on them." As for me, I must now go and read the rest of his book The Dream of Rome. Both speeches, by the way, can be seen on BBC On-Line.

Of course, a side effect of a Boris victory could mean that uncombed hair comes back into fashion. This is very good for me as I find that business very boring and do it as little as I can get away with. In fact, I don't actually own my own comb, although, this may be too much information! While we are on the subject of me, further to my photos of Fr. Nicholas outside West Country pubs, here I am (courtesty of Fr. N), outside Downside Abbey standing next to a car packed with dusty papers relating to an extinct religious order. Standing on the right of the photograph is G. Mc. our master driver.
While reading the blogs earlier this morning, I saw two foxes trot along the wall at the other end of the garden. The first fox, however, did look a little like a cat. Or, at least, that is what it looked like in the half second that I saw it. Apropros of nothing at all, here is a photograph of a robin redbreast perched in the trees of Downside. I had about five seconds to whip out my camera, switch it on and take the pic before the little thing flew away.

A Note on The Local Elections

I could never be a politician. Watching the BBC News tonight, even though I am not a supporter, I found myself feeling very sorry for the Labour Party activists who were witnessing the decimation of their party in the local elections that were held yesterday across England and Wales. All the effort they must have put in to ensure the return of their candidate for nothing.

And poor Gordon Brown. He had one good week as Prime Minister - the week after he took over the job from Tony Blair, last summer - but it has been all down hill ever since. Some of his trouble has been his fault, the 10p tax business, for example, but some of it has certainly been out of his hands: Northern Rock and the credit crunch. All Mr Brown needs now is sleaze scandals to start kicking in and he really will look like John Major in the last days of his Conservative Government.

As for the Tories, whether Brown becomes Major Jr or not, it looks like that party is on the up, up, up. Certainly, if Boris wins in London, it will not so much be the icing on the cake but proof that Labour could not win a one ticket raffle. A good job for Mr Brown et al that they do not have to call another election for two years.

Alexander in the lead

THANK YOU! to everyone who has voted in my Important Poll "Who Was the Greatest General in Antiquity". Eleven souls have done so. Not many, in the greater scheme of things, but it is still nice to know that ten other people like the great men of old enough to cast a vote. Or perhaps you were just indulging me, I don't mind. So far, the figures are: nine for Alexander and two for Julius Caesar. The great thing about the poll is that as far as I am concerned, there is no wrong answer. In their different ways, both men were the best at what they did. The vote is still open. Go and have your say!

Downside Abbey - Inside

As we saw yesterday, Downside Abbey was built in the gothic style. As it was built in the 20s, this must make it neo-neo gothic!

In the photograph above, the abbey looks rather like the Mines of Moria as represented by Peter Jackson. We heard Mass said in the church on Tuesday evening and Wednesday morning. At the latter Mass, the celebrant chose a nature article from The Times as the subject of his sermon. It was about golden eagles which sore high, but use their superior eyesight to spot their prey. Unfortunately, the eagle has come close to extinction. Thus, we as Christians should aim to soar like eagles and make sure that we do not become extinct, either. Where the catching prey bit fits in, I am not quite sure. You may think this sermon was retro-claptrap by a priest who still lived in the 60s. I, as someone who has benefitted lately from the Benedictines' hospitality, could not possibly comment.

Above is the last resting place of St. Oliver Plunkett, bishop of Armagh, who was martyred in the 1600s. And below is the grave of Cardinal Francis Aidan Gasquet, who was a monk of Downside. Whenever I see a cardinal's hat, hanging from the roof like this one, I always think of the old story (mediaeval in origin?) which said that deceased cardinals would remain in purgatory under the last tassle had fallen from the hat. That could be a bit of a wait!
Here is a detail from Gasquet's tomb. Before I move on, here is one last close up. It is the war memorial at the west end of the church. As you can see, the first name there is L. M. J. Belloc. I am not aware that the author had a brother, so I wonder if this could be a more distant relation?Looking through my album of photographs, I find that most of them are close ups of one thing or another. I'm afraid I did not take many broader photos, so apologies for that. Here, though, is another of that kind. It is the stained glass window in the abbey's north transept.
So, there we have it. A glimpse into Downside Abbey. It is far more beautiful than my photographs have made out, so if you are ever in the area (and if you visit Bath, you certainly are), I highly recommend it as a place to visit.

Downside Abbey - Outside

Downside Abbey belongs to the Benedictine order. They have a teaching charism, and indeed, there is a school at the Abbey, but I understand that the teachers are mainly lay folk now, with the monks only being involved as chaplains (although the Headmaster is a monk). Numerous famous people have passed through Downside School, including Auberon Waugh, who G. Mc. (an old boy, himself) remembered as being a horrible, sarcastic person. No change there from the Daily Telegraph writer then. Evelyn Waugh, Auberon's father, visited the school on occasion, usually being grumpy when he was there, as did Fr Ronald Knox, who came to see the school play. Hopefully he has less of a grump.

One notable person who remains at the Abbey is Fr. Philip Jebb, who is the grandson of Hilaire Belloc. He must be in his seventies or eighties now. When I met him, I tried to find Belloc in his features; it was hard, though, given that in his old age, Belloc hid his face behind a great bushy beard.

Before we go inside the Abbey, let's look around outside.

Here is a photo of the Abbey from the rear. The wall to the left is not a ruin. it was erected for a game. Not sure which one though.

This photograph is for Fr. Dwight Longenecker. I wonder when his gargoyle will find its voice? Incidentally, Father D., exhorts us to publicise the upcoming Annual Chesterton conference, which is being run by Dale Ahlquist who, father informs us, earns his bread by promoting G. K. Chesterton. I have never met Mr Ahlquist, but I am sure that if I did I would find him to be the most splendid of chaps (What is a chap, exactly? Can an American be one?) who would undoubtedly prefer beer to lager, tweeds to denim and a paradox to a mathematical answer. If any of the above is incorrect, please do not tell me. Sometimes, greater truth can be found in a lie. Or so G.K.C might have said, possibly.

Uhm, back to the photos!

The Gothic form is my favourite form of architecture, and one aspect of it of which I am particularly fond is the flying butress. Here is Downside Abbey's. It reminds me very much of those at Notre Dame in Paris.

This crucifix stands behind the Abbey, which, by the way, is one of only three basilicas in England. Interestingly, we spotted a crucifix at the corner of a country road on the way to / from Downside. This almost never happens in England. In France they are much more popular, so one can only wonder whose devotion got it placed there.

Tomorrow, I will upload the photos of inside the Abbey.

An Interlude

After leaving Douai Abbey, we stopped at a pub for some food and a pint of the local bitter. Fr. Nicholas expressed the laudable desire that the pub should be no younger than the fourteenth century. I don't think we managed to find one quite that old. But, it was fun looking out for them anyway. The Six Bells was our first target,

Alas, the peasants must have been working in the fields, because it was closed. But, retracing our steps (and here, I should acknowledge with thanks the effort of G. Mc. who was our master driver for this trip), we went back down the road to the Bladebone (because there is one encased in a copper case), which we had seen earlier.

And when we got there, who was happy to pose...?

Actually, thank you to Fr. Nicholas for being so game about being photographed. It makes me feel quite bad that I didn't get myself in the frame once or twice. Although, actually, I did, but we'll come to that later.

In the unlikely event that the parish priest reads this blog, I will confirm that Fr. Nicholas drank responsibly and with great devotion. It was a very smooth beer, after all.

I shall also add that if you ever find yourself in the West Country (I can't remember if we were in Somerset or Wiltshire when we got to the Bladebone Inn, I commend its steak to you. At £15 it wasn't cheap, but was a healthy portion of the meat. And did I mention how smooth the beer was?

Douai Abbey

On Tuesday this week, I joined Fr. Nicholas and G.Mc., a fellow parishioner on a trip to Downside Abbey to pick up some papers relating to a now extinct order of nuns. Downside somewhere in the deeps of Somerset (near Bath, actually), and so the plan was to stay there overnight.

We set off just after 10am and arrived seven hours later at around 5pm! Was this because of terrible roads? No, not quite. For a start, we took a very scenic route and secondly, we made a couple of stops.

The principal stop was Douai Abbey. Here it is.

From the outside, Douai Abbey is an unpromising sight. It has a stumpy appearance and the roof looks like it has slipped down and covered the walls. But this rather awkward appearance belies the beauty that lies within.

The timber echoes the old Anglo-Saxon mead halls while the sandstone perfectly compliments the long windows. As I wondered round the church, taking photographs, Fr. Nicholas disappeared - into the bookshop! Before I followed him in, I branched out into a new area of photography - close ups. I don't usually do those (if I have a photographic love, it is for landscapes), so here is how I got on.

It is a boss, high up in the ceiling. My camera has an excellent zoom facility. The boss, however, was only a preparation for a most beautiful sculpture of Our Lady.

I sing of a maiden
That is makeless[matchless];
King of all kings
To her son she ches[chose].

He came al so still
There his mother was,
As dew in April
That falleth on the grass.

He came al so still
To his mother's bour,
As dew in April
That falleth on the flour.

He came al so still
There his mother lay,
As dew in April
That falleth on the spray.

Mother and maiden
Was never none but she;
Well may such a lady
Goddes mother be.

Entering the bookshop, I found a little book called Questions & Answers - posed to and given by Pope Benedict during audiences with various groups (children, young adults and priests). Not a patch on his spiritual writing, nevertheless, it afforded some good insights in to what it means to be a Christian.

As we came out of the bookshop, we heard the sound of singing - the monks had gathered for the office. It was quite beautiful.

What's in a name? Fr. Nicholas and G. Mc, referred to Douai Abbey as Dow as in the Dow Jones Index, but every time I think of the word now, I think of it as Do - ee as in 'to do'.

Happy Ascension Day!